"Arise! Take up they bed and walk...or rather run!"

How many times had I started...started diets, started exercising, started "getting healthy" (whatever that means) only to put it off by "starting tomorrow." The hardest step in running for me was getting out of bed! Getting up in the morning, getting my running clothes on, getting out the door...each of these a battle with my own mind and it continued on everyday until I changed my mind, changed my reason for running. In the past, I ran because I had to for an aerobic class and or because I wanted to lose weight, but once I had finished those goals the desire to run got crowded out by other life activities that were "more important." This time, the goal, "to see if I could finish," kept changing and evolving. First, it was to see if I could "just finish a marathon." Then it became, "see if I can finish faster." The funny thing was even though I finished faster I was more discouraged than inspired... here's what happened.

My oldest brother Mario suggested Norman ( my other older brother) and I run the LA Marathon with him. Norman and I had just completed hiking half of the John Muir Trail putting in 8 to 17 miles a day with 40 lb back packs. Mario was supposed to have gone with us but his attorney schedule conflicted with the trip. Thus, the invitation to join him in LA. I figured it couldn't be any worse than hiking up 10,000+ peaks to the base of the next one "who knows how far" down the trail, trying to keep up with Norman's very fast hiking pace. In fact, I actually started "running" on that trip trying to keep Norman in sight. I'd grab my backpack straps, crouch down and "scoot" along with quick small steps in order to stay within view of his back side. This was faster and easier on my hips than trying to stride longer and became my running style later. (However, I was later informed by my kids when they saw me that they could walk faster than I could run!) Anyway, I asked Mario what time an average person should run a marathon in and he said under 5 hours. So that became my goal...to finish under 5 hours...and I did..4:42 to be exact and I was elated! That is until Mario mentioned that "you aren't a real runner until you finish under 4..."Oh!...I'm not a real runner? Even though he didn't finish (he twisted his ankle a few miles into the race and had to bail out) and I left Norman behind me and finished a solid half-hour ahead of him? (Another one of my goals on that marathon, to finish before Norman, so I wouldn't have to "keep up" with him like I did on the John Muir) So, I decided to run Silicon Valley Marathon and see if I could get a 4 hour marathon. I thought I was on pace for the 4 but when I ran into the finish I saw I was off by the 1.2 mile and ended up with a 4:14...28 minutes faster than LA but I was so disappointed I didn't get my 4 hour marathon I almost quit running! I beat myself up for a week and couldn't enjoy my great improvement! It was at that point I shift....I had to re-evaluate why I was running. And being the sanguine personality that I am, I decided that if I was going to keep running I would have to do it to have fun! From that point on, my goal in running was to enjoy it. Not to get healthy, not "to reach goals" but to enjoy the run. Life is too short, too full of responsibilities, too much stuff to cram into the day that you "have to do", running couldn't be "one more thing I have to do today". If I was going to keep running I would do it because I WANT to, I would have fun with it! I would run at a pace that I could relax in, the time I would spend running would be MY time to enjoy, to think, to talk to God, to leave my troubles and responsibilities behind...I could live with that..what's not to look forward to? It would be a mini-vacation....and that is what gets me out of bed!